The Family Bed

Since Christian was born, he has slept with me. Even in the hospital he never went to the nursery because, well, he didn't have to! I kept him close by my side so that I could feed him whenever he so wished. It was truly the easiest thing to do.When we got home, I tried putting him in his bassinet but was constantly awakened by every. single. noise he made. And because he wanted to eat or at least suckle for comfort sake most of the night, I kept him in bed with me.

Sleeping together in the hospital

Since he has gotten older, The Family Bed has become the place where Christian is the most relaxed and at ease. It has become the focal point of our home. For example, after dinner at night we all lay in bed and watch movies and cuddle until it is time for Christian to curl up and nurse himself to sleep. The Family Bed is also the place where we all bond in the mornings by cuddling and watching our little boy coo with content before the hectic day gets underway. I know several moms who are dead set against The Family Bed, but for us, it has worked out quite well. Not to mention, the fact that we share a Family Bed made traveling this summer sooo much easier as we needed no bottles (because he nurses) and no big, huge Pack and Play for him to sleep in. He always felt comfortable in the hotel rooms because he was in bed with Mom and Dad...just like at home!

Sleeping with Daddy

Many parenting books argue that The Family Bed, or co-sleeping, cheats your child from gaining independence and confidence. These books also stress the importance of scheduling your child for every moment of the day instead of following a routine. With my work schedule, a strict schedule for Christian is almost impossible. Perhaps if I had a 9-5 it would be more doable, but since I don't get home sometimes until midnight or later, I enjoy my time in bed with my son! Do I worry that he will be in our bed forever? Not half as much as I dread the day when he's not sleeping quietly beside me! Do I worry that he'll be a sissy kid unable to function in the real world because he needs his Mommy and Daddy all the time? Ummmm...have ya met my husband? Christian doesn't stand a chance when it comes to being a sissy. Ken is already talking about buying Christian his first gun...

Other people worry about there being a lack of intimacy between husband and wife with a baby in bed, and I admit, I miss holding my husband at night...but our sex life hasn't fallen by the wayside. Like, at all. Trust me...

However, (Yes. There's always a flip side...) Ken is not a fan of having Christian in bed with us till he's 5. He feels that it would be cheating Christian to have him sleep with us until he's "ready" for his own bed. And as a wife, I have to respect his feelings and wishes. The other thing is that recently, Christian has shown signs of not "needing" The Family Bed. He hasn't been able to nurse himself to sleep for the past week. I am distraught. I truly don't know the reason for this change in behavior...(I'd love some insight)...but it makes me sad. What if I'm not ready for Christian to fall asleep without nursing? Or what if I'm not ready for Christian to want to sleep down the hall from me? I know I sound selfish, right? And I need to do what's best for Christian...

Sleeping in bed all by himself

I suppose we're both growing, he and I. But growing with your child might be the hardest thing in the world...especially when you've had your mind about the kind of parent you're going to be and then you have to change because the kid you have doesn't care what books you've read or the pre-conceived notions you've concocted. They are little people, after all, who have preferences and personalities that aren't required to coincide with your own as Parent.

Ken and I have decided that when Christian starts solids on a regular basis (around 6 months) we will start putting him in his own bed at night. I hope Ken is stronger than me...because the first whimper I hear I'll be so tempted to bring him back to his comfort zone.

Any thoughts, suggestions, ideas, words of comfort are welcome! (Just please ensure you sugarcoat comments...my heart is already a little tender...)

Let's Go TEAM CHRISTIAN! (Four Month Checkup)

*Sigh* My little bundle of joy is FOUR MONTHS OLD! How did this happen? No one asked me if it was ok for him to grow one day older! But I suppose time stops for no one...not even His Majesty, Christian James.

Proof of the pudding!

Since we don't have a scale at our house, we really don't know how much Christian weighs until we visit the doctor. I don't worry about whether or not he's gaining and growing, because I know he is! But it's really exciting to finally see the fruits of all our efforts pay off and read the scale that so clearly said 14 POUNDS on its' screen! Yes ma'am! Our little Baboo weighed in at 14 pounds even. He has nearly doubled his birth weight!

SN: The reason his weight gain is always so exciting for me is because I am the one ensuring his growth with the milk that my body produces. It takes a huge physical commitment to stick with pumping at work...especially when it's busy out on the floor and you don't want to leave the selling effort (or when there are a million and one things to be done and it's all hands on deck!). But I have stuck by my goal of feeding Christian breastmilk for the first six months of his life through pumping at work, and I am damn proud of it! Not to mention, I have a husband who is so supportive.

Ok! So! Next on the docket was Christian's temperature...and guess what?! This is the first time he didn't pitch a fit when she stuck the thermometer under his arm! (Hey, folks! It's the simple things...)

Sad face, but NO tears!

The nurse then checked his breathing. Look how relaxed he was!

Christian has grown two and a half inches since his last doctor visit! He is officially 24.5 inches long!

                                                Grandma was so proud of Christian's growth!

The nurse took us to our room to wait for the doctor...and any parent can tell you it is a rare occasion that the doctor takes less than 15-30 minutes to finally get to your room. And I get it. Really. I do. But it does get a little frustrating if you have some place to be. Therefore, I try not to have any place to be on "doctor days". However, in the time that we waited for the doctor we did find opportunity for a mini-photo shoot! (big surprise, eh?)  

  After an exhausting photo shoot, Christian needed a little snack to restore his energy...

 

We love our doctor so much! She is a doctor who genuinely cares about her little patients and their needs (along with the millions of concerns the mommies and daddies have...). So, here is a run-down of the things we discussed...

-Christian is in the 25th percentile for height and weight. He has remained in his original growth curve and has not jumped up to a much higher percentile as many formula fed babies do. She says that he is growing perfectly and that he is very strong. 

-I told her that we were still co-sleeping and that I wasn't sure I wanted to give it up. She pointed out the fact that co-sleeping isn't a problem until the parents want their child out of their bed. I found this point interesting, and I will expound on this topic in a later blog.

 

-She encouraged me to start Christian on solids (cereal first, then greens...) as he tried to EAT the tongue depressor...yeah. Not kidding. Look...

I asked her about whether it was a very bad idea to let him try some solids like bananas or yogurt or ice cream. And she said, "yes"...no more bananas or yogurt or ice cream until he develops a taste for green vegetables. Which, she said we could start solids like cereal at any time and then veggies at five months. I talked to my lactation consultant, mother and Ken about starting solids and we decided to start cereal, fed only with a spoon, at five months (People who put cereal in bottles when their baby is three months or less frustrate the daylights out of me! They say things like, "he was always hungry so the doctor said he could have cereal"...Well, guess what?! He's a baby and he's growing...of COURSE he's always hungry! And it's your duty as a parent to feed him every time he's hungry...have you read anything about cluster feeding? Or growth spurts? Yeah, read a book and then talk to me about why your child needs solids at three months. My other favorite argument for feeding a baby cereal is, "he doesn't sleep through the night, so we give him cereal to make him sleep". Well, this may be news to your ears, but a baby isn't going to sleep much longer than 5-6 hours straight until they are anywhere from 6 to 12 months old. And when you signed up for the whole "mommyhood" thing, that included some sleepless nights. Sorry about your luck. This is obviously one topic of which I am overly passionate about.) We then decided to start veggies at 6 months. No need to rush his growth when he's doing just fine.

-She noted that he had several bug bites. I asked her what to use to prevent bites since using bug repellant on a baby is not a good idea. She suggested lightly spraying his clothing instead of spraying repellant directly on his skin. 

 

-Christian has a pretty significant rash under his chin from spit up and drool (no teeth yet, but they're comin'!) I asked her what we could do for the rash and she offered putting some Desitin on it since it's similar to a diaper rash. (SN: I put a tube of Desitin in Ken's toothbrush drawer and I keep waiting for him to accidentally use it as toothpaste...HAHA! I am such a sweet wife!)

-The doctor reiterated the fact that Christian needs vitamin D drops since that is the one vitamin that doesn't translate through breastmilk. Admittedly, we have to be more consistent about doing this. 

 

-Christian "talked" to the doctor the entire time we were there...(except when she shushed him to hear his heartbeat)! She said he was "finding his voice". And believe me, he finds his voice all. the. time! It is such a wonder to hear him squeal and scream and chatter for hours on end. He especially loves talking to Remmy or whoever is having a conversation in the room. It's almost as if he has something to contribute to the current discussion. Here's a video of him talking to Grandma...

Honestly, we didn't have a whole lot of questions about his development since he has hit every milestone for his age before his time. Dr.Rosenthal just kind of doted on him and squeezed him and loved on him for quite a while. What doctor does that? It's because of her genuine love of babies that I will continue to wait 15-30 minutes extra to see her. She is a Godsend as far as I am concerned! Here is a video of her and him together...

After the doctor left, it was time for vaccinations. Yeah, they're not our favorite, but at least Christian got to have one of the edible ones before the shots. You know how much he loves those! The nurse commented (again) on how easy he was about eating the vaccine...she said most babies spit it right back out. I told her that he'll eat just about anything that's put in his mouth...Christian asked if he could get one for the road...

                                                    Then, the dreaded shots...

Wait for it, wait for it...

There it is! Poor guy...

I've found that there's almost nothing a breast won't fix...(even though it looks like he's about to punch me)

After we got done at the doctor's office, we walked over to the birth care center at Newton General to see Kris, my lactation consultant. She is such an amazing woman and I couldn't imagine doing what she does on a daily basis...especially considering the rate of women who choose not to breastfeed. I would feel so defeated every day. But not Kris...she keeps her chin up! She expressed the need for new lactation consultants as many women her age would be retiring soon with no one to replace them. 

It was great to see her and talk about my success in breastfeeding Christian and even discuss the difficulties we faced in the beginning. It was a great outlet and a great opportunity to share with another woman who got it. 

By the time we got done visiting, Christian was out! He was exhausted after having "talked" the doctor's ear off and having had shots. He deserved the four hour nap that followed! He was quite the little trooper...

We go back for Christian's 6 month checkup in September. I'm not quite ready to wrap my arms around the fact that he will be 6 months old in only a short while. I beg all of my new-mommy friends to savor every second...even the rough ones. Theses young and simple days will be mere grains of sand blown away by the wind, never to return.

Father's Day

Even though Ken has celebrated several Father's Days already, there were still a couple of firsts to be celebrated this year! One of those firsts (that tickled Ken to death!) was that ALL of his children sent him a Father's Day card before the holiday. Normally cards trickle in over the course of a week after whatever holiday it is, but this time the kids did it up royal and got those cards in the mail right on time for Ken's big day! (Hey! It's the little things, ok?)

The second first (That sounds funny...) was that Christian was here to celebrate Father's Day with Ken (duh)! Ken isn't a big gift person. Usually, if he wants something, he buys it. Now, I will always take note of little things I hear him ask for so when a holiday comes along I can surprise him with presents he would usually consider "frivolous". And to emphasize how little we concentrate on possessions, let me just make note that I don't even remember what we bought Ken for father's day (It's been more than a month already!)...other than a very sweet book called, "I Love My Daddy" (check it out!). It's such a precious book all about Daddy and Christian and the special time they spend together; the simple things they do together that make their relationship so special.

 

We also took Ken out to eat his favorite food...sushi! Our family is crazy about sushi so when it's someone's special day and they get to choose where they want to eat, we're ALL excited! Here are some great pictures...

Christian holds chopsticks!

Playing with the chopsticks with Daddy...

Random Asian lady who insisted on holding Christian. I'm sure this is like, good luck or something. Like, maybe Christian will live 100 years now or something... No, but seriously, not enough people ask to hold other people's kids! I don't mind if people want to hold Christian...I would love for people to ask to hold him more! It's not a crime. But I guess germophobes have ruined it for all of us...

Black and white!

Mommy holds the baby AND eats sushi with chopsticks...now THAT'S what I call multitasking!

My two loves...Damn, my husband makes a good lookin' kid!

Mommy and Christian

In color!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Daddy took his own photo shoot in the morning...he got some great shots including this special "Father's Day Smile"...

Stoic Christian

Coy Christian

We had a great day together as a family! Christian couldn't possibly have a better Daddy...nor could he have one who loved him as much.